Thursday, August 10, 2006

Sparrows have won; get over it

I like sparrows. Obviously. They're small, cheeky little birds that have managed to infiltrate everywhere.

I grew up in an area that was all tract homes, built over old dairies and farmland. When they built the houses, they bulldozed everything for miles around to put up the tract homes on. There were no trees, no plants, no anything, other than houses, lawns, and swimming pools. The only birds we had were sparrows and crows. As a little kid, I had no idea that there were so many other types of birds in the world. I had seen sea gulls at the beach, but that was about it. I spent a lot of time in our backyard, wishing we had a tree, and learning to imitate the calls of sparrows and crows.

Since then, I have found out that there are a lot of other birds, in our area even, as my husband has planted trees, bushes, bamboo, flowers, everything in our yards, and they attract all kinds of wildlife. It is very peaceful in our backyard now, and the sound of the wind rustling through the bamboo leaves almost masks the gunfire and police helicopters flying over our neighborhood.

I like having all these plants and trees, as I did not have them growing up. An old hippie, who was hired by our landlady as a house painter, was completely amazed by our yard, and commented "It's like Vietnam in there, man!" The '60's were good to him; not that he can remember them. My husband has woven withy fences all along the side yard, to keep the homeless people from nesting in there, and to keep the drug addicts from having a shite in our bushes, the dirty buggers.

Because of all the plantings, we get all kinds of finches, hummingbirds, kestrels, and hawks, and also mockingbirds that sing to us at night. The crows are starting to come back, having somewhat recovered from the West Nile epidemic. My sparrows are there, too.

I recently found out that there are some stupid fucks out there that do not like sparrows, and consider them a nuisance, as they are not native to America. I find this quite rich, as these people are usually white, upper-class, liberal twats of the type that will self-righteously champion Native American rights. They have whole websites about how sparrows should be euthanized so the native bird population can recover. News flash to them: you're a honky. Go ask an Indian what they think of you being here, whitey. I'll bet they wouldn't mind you being euthanized. Are you going to volunteer for it?

These are also the same people who feel that they should support the rights of illegal immigrants, but are secretly afraid of all the brown people taking over. So, while they're giving lip service for the right of all those illegal immigrants to be here, they should try to remember that the sparrows didn't ask to be brought here, but they are here now, and they just want to bang their wives, and raise their little bird families, and fit into whatever niche they can. It's not their fault that they are willing to take whatever leftovers society has thrown out, and are far superior to the native bird population. It's called "evolution," survival of the fittest. You know, that thing you want your kids taught in science class instead of (Not So) Intelligent Design.

It all comes down to self-hate. These people hate themselves for being European, and they hate the sparrows for the same reason; that supposedly, neither of them are native. Well, if the sparrows (and all of us whiteys) aren't native, then what are we? We were born here, and it's been quite some time since we've taken over. Like Spike said to Buffy, "You won; get over it."

Some people have a problem with this concept, and simply cannot grasp the fact that an incident that happened hundreds of years ago has been decided, and the winners of whatever battle, etc. are not simply going to change their minds and say "Oops, I'm sorry! I'm enlightened now, so here, please have your land back."

I have a long-time close friend, whose family is from Ireland (as is mine; whose family isn't, if you're white and in America?!), and years ago she would go on about how the IRA (those murdering arse pimples) were freedom fighters, and if the British were truly as civilized as they thought they were, they would just give all of Ulster back to Ireland. I put up with this for a while, like you do when someone's in their cups, but soon I couldn't take it any longer, so I asked her, quite simply, if she and her family were going to hand their land back over to the Indians. No, they weren't? Would they do it if Northern Ireland belonged to Ireland? Would they move to Ulster then? No? Then you should fucking well shut your gob, you gormless fuckwit. Good friends can say these things to each other, you see, with no hard feelings.

I'm not advocating that we all start our own "White Pride" club. I fucking well hate Nazis. But, I'm getting real tired of seeing T-shirts advertising "Brown Pride," (with a brown hand showing the international sign of good will) and "Black Pride" (with a big black fist). What are those saying, if not "Fuck off, cracker, just because you're white"? If those kids are allowed to wear those to school, then my kid should be allowed to wear a "White Pride" T-shirt to school. And I would damn well make her, too, if not for the fact that she would get seven shades of shite knocked out of her. If it's rude to wear "White Pride" T-shirts, it's just as rude to wear "Brown/Black Pride" T-shirts, and affirmative action and the politically correct twats can kiss my petunia.

I've had a few encounters with white supremacists in my time (my idiot brother being one of them, which is fucking hilarious, as our Gran was full-blooded Cherokee, and we're Dagos on the other side, and he's pretty dark himself, not to mention the fact that he totally wasn't raised that way), and it seems that most of them are too fucking stupid to realize that skin color is not culture. There are white Mexicans, with mainly European ancestry, and Spain and Northern Italy are not full of darkeys, for example. Do those dumb racists count them as "white"? And I don't care what color you are; if you're in to golf or tennis, or any sport involving snow or ice, culturally, that should be counted as you being "white." Good grief; even black people slag off other black people for "acting white" if they play golf or tennis. You see how dumb it is to put people in categories like this, in today's world? Of course you do; you're not a fuckwit.

I don't have anything against immigrants; brown, black, spotted, whatever. I am thankful as fuck for them almost every day. If it wasn't for them, we'd all be stuck eating British food, and believe me, I know first-hand how shite that is. I don't care if they assimilate, I don't care if they learn to speak English; just keep cooking and selling nice food and letting me buy it. Smiling and drooling, while pointing at a menu, has always enabled me to communicate just fine. Waving money around while being extremely polite doesn't hurt, either.

I loved the part in that stupid "Day After Tomorrow" movie where all the dumb Americans are having to ask permission to cross the border to get in to Mexico. That was fucking class. Of course you know it wouldn't be happening that way, though. If the Americans were denied permission, they'd be crashing the gate and scaling the fences, just like the Mexicans do now. It's a whole different set of rules when it's your survival at stake, isn't it? Something that those Minutemen on the border don't seem to realize.

I also loved that new episode of "30 Days," where your Minuteman guy went and lived with that illegal immigrant Mexican family, and then went down to Mexico to see how they all had lived, before they came to America. That was a real eye-opener for that dumb fuck.

Why is it that Americans have no problem sending millions of dollars of aid money to Africa, for starving people, but God forbid we should spend a single cent on anyone dying in our own backyard? I suppose "familiarity breeds contempt," but that's no excuse. I hate that "I got mine; the rest of you can fuck off" attitude that a lot of Americans have. They should all be forced to read Ursula K. Le Guin's "The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas," and have to live in hovels with no running water, or toilets, or food, and then we'll see how dirty and hungry and desperate they are.

I wish people would actually think about all of these issues, instead of having knee-jerk reactions to them, I wish they would force people to take classes in logic and reasoning, and I wish liberal posh white people would quit taking it up the ass from brown and black people, just for being white. It's making it harder for the rest of us, because the message being sent out is, "It's okay to pick on white people," which is the same as saying, "It's okay to pick on people solely based upon the color of their skin," and the posh honkies are just too fucking dumb to realize it.

I wish all the brown and black people that were born here would realize that not all white people are assholes that want to make their life a living hell, and that they have to be pro-active (I am such a twat for using that word) regarding their own futures. This whitey is not keeping you down; your own ignorance is. This here whitey is in the same below-poverty-level, no-car-having, food-stamp-using, welfare ship that you are. It ain't no Carnival cruise, and I'm doing my damnedest to make sure my kids rise way, way above this level, before the water comes in and swamps us. I'm lucky, I know. I'm in this position due to a disability, and my educational level is unbelievably high, compared to the rest of the people in the above-mentioned categories. I skew, and screw, the statistics dreadfully.

I suppose, in the end, what I would like everyone to realize, is that it shouldn't matter what color you are; discrimination is discrimination, dammit. It's a roll of Karma's fucking dice what color or ethnicity you came out, or what country you popped out of your mom's twat in; get over it.

Fat Sparrow

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