Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Fuck you and the horse-faced wife you rode in on

Matthew Broderick is at it again. He just can't seem to stay out of trouble in Ireland, whether it's NI or RoI.

You would think that after not knowing how to drive on the right (or left) side of the road, and killing a couple of locals in Enniskillen, County Fermanagh, NI, he would vacation someplace else. But no, apparently not, for here he was in Ireland again, getting his collarbone broken in a fall from a horse. No, you fuckers, it was NOT his wife he was riding at the time. It was an actual horse, but I can see how you were confused.

Note to Matthew Broderick: Please don't ride (or drive) anything else in Ireland or NI, including your horse-faced wife.

When 70-something William Shatner can ride a horse better than you, it's time to lay off the ponies, Matt. What's next, taking up ATV riding with Ozzy Osbourne?

Fat Sparrow


Foot Eater said...

Matthew Broderick ran over a couple of people in Enniskillen? What happened? Sorry, I can't be bothered to Google it.

Fat Sparrow said...

Yup, in 1988. Not exactly breaking news.

It's the most sparsely populated county in NI, so he probably killed the only 2 people for miles around.

Um, I would have put up a link, but soooomeone (okay, it's you) dislikes excess links in blog posts. I fear you have been a bad influence on me.

Foot Eater said...

One link hardly qualifies as an excess, Fat (may I call you that?) Now I will have to Google it, damn your little beady black eyes.

By the way, you're not Sam ProblemChildBride in disguise, are you? You kind of read like her but with added sex and profanity.

Fat Sparrow said...

You can call me whatever you like, as long as you call me! (says she, wagging her tail feathers suggestively)

May I call you Geoffrey?

As you can see, I have now put in a link, just for you.

Nope, I'm definitely not Sam in disguise. I just discovered her blog, actually, and haven't had a chance to read much of it. The area she lives in here in So Cal is rather hoity-toity. I'm in the cheap seats, the so-called Inland Empire. Everyone else makes fun of us, and rightly so. It seems she and I do have a few things in common, though.

Hey, can I steal that line? That's pretty good... "Fat Sparrow -- Now with added sex and profanity!"

Sam, Problem-Child-Bride said...

I've never met a Geoffrey I liked.

I didn't know you were in California, Spar'. I had placed you back East for some reason. Sitemeter tells me I've had a few hits from Rancho Cucamonga I hadn't noticed before - is that you?

"It seems she and I do have a few things in common, though."
We do? Here is what I know about you - We've both raised baby birds, have kids, live in California, and are in Euro-American marriages. Do we have other stuff in common too? Christ, you're not a nutter are you. Tell me, if I were to say carbamazepine, gabapentin or valproate would they mean anything to you?

I've been having a snoop around your site. Top stuff, Sparra! I'll be back.

Fat Sparrow said...

I was on your site last night, for quite a bit. When I find a blog I like, I read through the entire archives, so that I can catch up.

I don't know where my AOL server goes through, but I'm not in RC. I'd rather not say exactly where I am, right on the blog, as I am rather hincty about friends/family/neighbors discovering this by accident. I plan on slagging them all off, you see.

I have my Internet lives in nice little compartments at the moment, and I don't want them mixed, or, God forbid, Googled, which is one reason why I don't blog under my real name.

Yep, they sure would, as would a host of others. E-mail me at TheFatSparrow@aol.com, and I'll bend your ear about this, and my location, etc.

And thanks for the compliment! I'm thrilled to have you as a reader.